Thursday, July 11, 2019

WTF is going on with my Facebook Friend Requests?



I was talking to Naeemah today.  Not myself, there’s another one out there, and yes, we do know each other.  Our names weren’t the only thing we had in common.  We were talking about singleness and dating.
I’ve been getting like a shit ton of friend requests to my personal Facebook page, like 2-4 requests a day for the last 3 or 4 months.  One day I counted 17 requests.  I accept based on the age: not too young, I’m not a cougar or a mom of any kind and not too old but I appreciate a distinguished gentleman and whether or not I think they’re cute. Most of the requests are from guys that live in my home country St. Kitts. Since I haven’t lived there for 15 years and move in and out like I owe money when I do visit, I didn’t think they were intentionally for me.  The other Naeemah lives at home and is very pretty with the most captivating smile, another thing we have in common.  I thought the friend requests were for her.  So I had to ask her what happened.  I thought maybe she told the world that she was single and looking and sent all the men crazy trying to slide into her DM’s.  Men aren’t the most detailed creatures I know so a Naeemah H mistake would be so easy to make.  And voila I have 200 more FB friends for no particularly good reason.  But why?
Cause dating and relationships are in a suck phase right now.  Let’s be real, it’s been in a suck phase for a while.  After she told me that the dating scene was challenging back home I had to share that it was no different here in the US, at least not in my neck of the woods, Hotlanta, GA.  I see entirely too many pretty, intelligent, self-actualized females at home and abroad up and down my timeline barely restraining their combustible frustrations with dating.  We want to be ok with our singleness, we are ok with our singleness, we’re awesome but goddamit why are we still single?  Why do guys in and out of relationships add you on social media to stalk you, like 17 of your profile pictures in a half hour, and never say anything?  What the entire fuck is going on? What happened to us?
I’m equally frustrated and amused at this current state of affairs and seek to study it, to understand and to seek solidarity from my fellow sisters about it.  I needed an outlet.  That’s why I write.

2 comments:

  1. Thats what people do, they see something and click like. It's the age of social media. A "like" doesn't mean they want to date you...it's as simple as, I saw it....I liked it.....I moved on. I see handsome men and I click like if they look good in the pic. Doesn't mean I want to date them. I just simply liked their pic. I think people read way more into social media then they should. I guess I'm kinda old school too. Unless your asking me out on a real date, likes mean nothing. I ran into a guy at the car dealership a month or two ago and he was like "Hey Andrea". I had no clue who this guy was. Let's face it, sometimes we accept requests just for shits and giggles. He was like, "you're so pretty. I be liking all your pictures ". I asked him his name, gave him a hug because hey we're FB friends. We chit chat and then I get ready to leave a he says "congratulations on your marriage. I say thank you. He then proceeds to say, "I was tryna be the one". Huh?? How the hell were you trying to do that? I dont recall being asked out. He said, "well I liked all your pics like everyday ". Its nonsense. Speak up or get left back. How is one supposed to distinguish between hey I just liked your picture and hey I liked your picture and I want to get to know you? Ain't nobody got time for that. Men better speak up and act adult like. I dont know why they want women to be the aggressors these days. Not me! 🤷🏽‍♀️

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